Dean's Blather d'Impertinence

The Gnomes Grew Closer Still

2009-02-14T20:57:00.008-06:00

..."The gnomes grew closer still in the closeness of the stillness, still growing ever closer. Was that grumbling the bowing of the tree, or perhaps the bed timbers stretching? Yet I'm certain I recognize the rattletapping sound of their hunt bounties, their nutmeat swag agitating the burlap of their sacks. Did I mention their nutmeat swags and their sacks? Anyway... why do they all look the same to me? If one of them were to carefully remove it's little red pointy hat to reveal a likewise conical head, I think I would never stop laughing."

If you are suffering from Gnome Fascination, you are not alone. There are approximately abillion people on this planet and most of them have no overly-outward attraction to the tiny forest-dwelling peoplekind but for those who do, there is a simple and mild solution to this pleasantly nagging condition according to something I read somewhere. That makes it true, right?

Reproduction of "A Dream of Forest Gnomes" (2007). This is a first edition print in a series of 100 and is hand signed, dated and numbered by the artist. It is a reproduction of an original work created on black on white clay scratchboard panel with acrylic wash color. Print measures 8.5" x 11".

Available at Dean's Images d'Impertinence Fine Art Shoppe at http://abillion.etsy.com

Too Late...

2009-01-19T21:25:00.006-06:00

With but hours to go before the grand event of Barack Obama becoming the 44th President of the United States of America, I thought up a witty T-Shirt/Bumper Sticker line:

"Uprooting Bush is a Great Obamanation"

...now to build my time machine and travel back in time a year or so to make my billions on trivial political knick-knacks... jeeeeesh...

The Magnetic Personalities of Fish

2008-11-18T20:44:00.006-06:00

Ah, the Fish People... That elusive, subversive and submersive race of half fish, half human thangs from the Victorian age. Did they truly exist? No one knows for sure. We are but left with stained renderings of their scaly kind, decked out in their lace and wool finery. Yet oh so fine they are as surreal decorations to ponder...

Here we have a set of two Magnets from the series "19th CENTURY FISH PEOPLE PORTRAITS" (2008) . These sturdy metal magnets measure approximately 2" x 3" and have a smooth finish that easily wipes clean. They are reproductions of ink marker drawing/watercolor on paper paintings that were intentionally stained with a coffee wash to give them an older, worn look as if they were found in the leaky attic of an under-kept, over-aged mansion. A pair of strange little aquatic friends to adorn your refrigerator or any metal surface....What a catch!

Available at Dean's Images d'Impertinence Fine Art Shoppe at http://abillion.etsy.com

A Joyous Halloween to All

2008-10-31T13:30:00.007-05:00

Creeeeepy, spoooooky, scaaaary!!! What could be more horrific than Dick Cheney? A self-serving Frankenstein's monster with an adjenda of doom... Well the SUV-driving, gun-toting Sarah Vampyra Palin will give him a run for his blood-money... Hell, what could be more scary than politics and politicians? Grim Grinning Ghosts come out to socialize....

Pictured are not the spirits of political figures, at least not from present day, but rather charming tabletop stand-ups - One-Of-A-Kind acrylic paintings on sturdy matboard with fold-out stand on back. Each measures approximately 4" x 5" and are hand signed and dated on the back. Great for year 'round decoration of your haunted mansion.... BoogieBoogieBoogie!

Available at Dean's Images d'Impertinence Fine Art Shoppe at http://abillion.etsy.com

Edible Art?

2008-10-29T13:30:00.003-05:00

Is edible art the future? With the US economy attempting to drip-fill the inside gap of an abandoned white-wall tire thus unintentionally breeding hoards of unwelcome mosquitoes intent on drinking our blood, what can the starving artist do to survive? The list of necessities in 98% of American households now begin with food, gasoline, mortgage/rent... and where is art on that list? Art as a necessity is possibly but unlikely scribbled on the back of that list. Art IS a necessity - a world without any would implode.

So what can artists do to survive? How about edible art? Flavored paints on fruit roll-ups... the ol' chopped liver sculpture... collages made from fridge scraps... This way art would become a necessity, a staple. Do you know anyone who would rush out to buy a cake decorated with steampunk imagery or pork loins cut into bat shapes?

Mmmmm... getting hungry..., staying hungry...

"Girl Chasing Bats"

2008-10-20T10:07:00.007-05:00

Ahhh... What could be more fulfilling than to be out in a field on the night of a full moon frolicking with bats? I ask you. Well this adolescent finds nothing more enjoyable.

As youngin's, my friends and I would find entertainment at a summer's dusk under a freshly lit streetlamp watching the local bats swoop toward the tasty prey swarming around the light. Some nights, if prepared, we would bring a small blob of raw ground chuck and toss tiny pieces up to the light of the lamp to enforce showtime. Magnificent.

I made this cartoony, gouache on watercolor paper painting as a Christmas gift for my mother. I now offer first edition prints in a series of 50, each hand signed, dated and numbered (Print measures 8" x 10" (includes white border - image size is 5" x 7"). Unframed.

Available at Dean's Images d'Impertinence Fine Art Shoppe at http://abillion.etsy.com

The Information Rage

2008-10-13T16:20:00.003-05:00

In this information age of overwhelming possibilities, there is the existence of the "search engine". The moniker, "Google" has become a verb. The world virtually at your greasy fingertips.

So one sleepless night, I "Googled" my name: Dean Kendrick
to see if my links were in the mix, hoping my art was well represented and accessible to the surfing public. Oh! Many Dean Kendrick links appeared! Of course through further inspection I discovered the horrible truth - I was not the only Dean Kendrick! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! I thought my name was just off enough not to have been duplicated elsewhere. Hmmmm.... Pod people, or dopplegangers I wondered. How many dopplegangers can one person have?

I read through the links - a doctor, a bicyclist, an artist, ....an artist? WHAT? This wasn't one of my links! It was a Dean Kendrick in the UK with link after link of his canvases for sale through venue after venue. Well, crrrrrrrap. I took a look at some of his work, very art-school, textbook soul. Phew. At least it's nothing like mine. But all those links to Dean Kendrick - the wrong artist!

After weeks of rage, frustration, bewilderment, I decided to add my middle initial to my signature - Dean A. Kendrick. Now the spiders of the web can pounce and feed on prospective link bugs that will necessarily, though slightly, separate me from the impostor and any other dirty lurking minions.

"My First Pet" ACEOs

2008-10-08T14:32:00.002-05:00

"MY FIRST PET" (2008) is a series of 8 ACEO prints. They each measure 2.5" x 3.5" and are reproductions of original acrylic on paper paintings. Each card is initialed on the front and signed and dated on the back.

Everyone remembers their first pet. But do you really remember it as it actually was or, like this imaginative Victorian Era child, the way you wanted it to be?

The children and scenery are sketched from late 1800's photographs, though not entirely faithfully to the photographers for I do jones on combining elemental bits of several photos to make up a single character or setting. And obviously, this method was applied to the "pets." No animals were harmed to create these works though I think I accidentally stepped on the tail of my sister's cat...

Available at Dean's Images d'Impertinence Fine Art Shoppe - http://abillion.etsy.com

*ACEO stands for "Art Cards, Editions and Originals". These popular, collectible cards are exclusively 2.5" x 3.5" in size*

One, Two...Bite, Cut, Chew...

2008-10-08T02:09:00.000-05:00

Salutatons readers!
This is my initial venturing into the blogosphere, to boldly go where everyone has gone before...

I will be utilizing this cyberpage predominately to showcase my ART - Fine Art, Animations, and Music. So let's start thangs off with my inclusion in the great American experiment called capitalism by listing my links:

Fine Art - http://abillion.etsy.com

Animations - http://theirritants.com/idi/

Music - http://theirritants.com

Consume. Rinse. Consume again.